Just a Thought

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So I'm taking this to mean that it's totally and completely okay that I don't do yard work.
Even if it mean our yard is mowed weekly (by Zach) and not much else is done because I don't enjoy it.

I also take it to mean that it's okay that I'm blogging right now (with passion) and not doing laundry because I don't have a passion for laundry at this very moment.

I do get musters of passion for housework and it will come, but it's not here now.

So if I feel passionately about reading a book outside so that I feel the sun on my skin (and hope it kisses it some) Then that's okay?

If I love chilling with Mal when I get home in my quiet peaceful residence and would rather do that then go out and join the rest of the world, that's okay, too...because I'm passionate about Mal and my house.

 Right?

   I think I agree.

Finding Balance

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I have lots of friends.

Church Friends

Work Friends

Just regular friends found wherever...

I have friends from before marriage

Friends from during courtship/engagement

Friends from after marriage.

I've always been proud of how different all of my friends are.

Like every single one of them is different.

It's always been that way and I think it's good.

However, lately it's been a source of frustration for me,

My husband works and goes to school.

 When he's home he's usually doing homework.

We have plans every week with each other and sometimes with others.

I work and have busy callings at church.

We both have families here.

Is it bad that I sometimes find it a little frustrating that in order to "catch up" with friends I haven't seen I have to meet someone, closer to them because somehow I feel guilty for living where I do so I drive to them.I usually end up going out to eat, because that's what friends do?

Gas rounds up to $4 a gallon.

And a meal is at least three times that.

That's a lot of money.

When you have 10 different friends.

Wanting to have lunch at ten different times.

It can add up pretty quickly.

I can't get all of my friends together at once.

I feel too pressured to make sure everyone is being spoken to/acknowledged/entertained/having fun

And almost always someone is not being spoken to/acknowledged/entertained/having fun

And out comes the phone (which is cue for a whole different post entirely)

Facebooking, Texting, Etc....

like seriously, you are coming to something I have planned and asked you to be at and just because you don't have my attention this very second that calls for Facebooking via the phone?!?! I can seriously feel my blood pressure rising. 

It is not fun for me.

I end up more mad at my friends than happy I saw them.

A girlfriend of mine had a birthday party at The Cheesecake Factory a little while back

She invited roughly 20 people. No joke.

It was packed. Originally I was sitting by someone I had never met before.

A bunch of single girls from a new ward that I was never a part of.

I didn't even get to talk with my friend at all over dinner.

I didn't care.

It was her birthday and she wanted all of her friends together.

I met some new people and visited and enjoyed some dessert.

It was fine.

I left there thinking, "Why can't I do that?!" 

Why do I feel so obligated that everyone be happy...when if I'm the one planning it, it should be my way, right?

I often get this line,"Well you let me know when you want to do something because you're always so busy."

This puts a lot of pressure on me to practically maintain a friendship.

And I am busy. And I like my house. And I like my husband.

And gas is expensive and eating out adds up.

I am meeting all of my people next week over the course of four days for lunch dates etc. 

And then I am just inviting everyone to game nights and dinners at our house...single /married...Mormon/ not...nerdy/not nerdy...you get the drift.Come one, come all! You like us...surely you can all find a common thread of sometime. Really they're all awesome.

That will be my attempt at getting together with my friends. 

And that's just it!

'

Words of Wisdom

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Do you like this random Christmas picture in the midst of summer? Me too. I haven't shared it yet, but it makes me happy.

I love these words.

Too often I think we look for the faults. We compare our spouses to some ideal that isn't there.

The fact of the matter is, there are so many of us who have found the ideal for us as individuals.

I feel so blessed to have found mine.

And even though I love him like crazy...

I think I'm gonna try to "love a little hard when there's love to be had..."

 

Answer This

What are some traditions that your family has?

During our heritage lesson on Sunday some of the girls and leaders shared some family traditions.

I loved listening to them.

There are several that I would love to adopt. 

Family traditions fascinate me.

Our family traditions may be smallish in nature but here are a few:

*Santa still comes to visit Shane and me. As does the Easter Bunny. True. And I look forward to it/need it.

*Pajamas for Christmas Eve every year aside from the one year my mom made a massively poor choice and went with bathrobes.

*Every Christmas Eve my grandpa reads the Christmas story from the bible.
*And every Christmas Eve the kids act out the nativity.
*In Zach's family we have Gingerbread House Wars

*Zach and I have just started gifts of Love, Want, and Need for Christmas. (Thanks to Aleisha and Rich for sharing that tradition with us. We love it and will do it with our kids, too)

*For our first anniversary Zach and I decided that we will not buy separate gifts for each other but that we'll make a purchase together for something fun that we can do/use. Whether it be a game, camping equipment, a vacation, etc...Something we will enjoy together and will make memories.)

But I'm just dying to hear more.

So tell me:

What are some of your family traditions? 

My Last Name

Yesterday the Young Women had a lesson on heritage. I loved the lesson.

I especially loved the question that was posed:

"What kind of ancestor will you be?"

When I met Zach/realized I wanted to marry Zach (those two are pretty much synonymous)

I had a very difficult time with the idea of parting with my last name.

Do I hyphen it?

Do I keep it as a middle name?

Do I get rid of it all together? Just the thought of that made me shutter...

You wouldn't believe the heated remarks you can get out of just about anyone when you bring that up. 

Everyone had an opinion on it: my principal, my future father-in-law, my friends, my co workers, my ward members. 

But I just couldn't handle the idea of parting with the last name I was given.

With what it represented to me.

To me, my maiden name represents

This woman:

 

My grandma.

The biggest compliment you can give to me is to either tell me I look like her or that I have a characteristic of hers. My mom is best at doing this.

To me, my Grandma Marty is my last name. She encompasses so much that I desire to be:

Righteous

Steadfast

Strong

Intelligent

Faithful

Tall

A forever brunette

Well-Dressed

Well Respected

I love all of my family. 

My maiden name means a lot to me because it is my family.

It is my history.

And I had a hard time parting with it.

It's the name I share with my brother.

It's the name that followed me for a quarter of a century.

It's the name on my college degree.

It's the name that hung above my very first classroom door.

So I kept it.

It is still there. 

It's legally still my name.

In addition, I got another last name... 

I am every bit as proud of it.

I'm proud of it, mostly because of my husband.
I am so proud to be his wife. 

But also because my husband carries this man's last name, as well. And I could not be more proud.

On Father's Day we spent some time at Grandma and Grandpa's house.

Those two treat me like I'm family.

100%

I have always had a thing for grandparents.

They are such great gifts.

I watched Grandpa play with his great-granddaughter and my eyes teared up.

I cannot wait to get to see him hold our baby someday.

I can't wait to pass this heritage on to someone else.

So what kind of ancestor will I be? 

I certainly hope the kind that will make my posterity proud to carry on my name.

I can think of no greater honor to those who have given me theirs...

"I may never make it famous, but I'll never bring it shame. It's my last name."

"My Last Name" by Dierks Bentley

 

WAIT A MINUTE

This blog is mainly a self help version for me today but, I do think that any of you that are reading it probably DO need it too.
So last week I was coming home from work at around 6.30 and was on the phone with my sister and we were going over all the stuff that needed to be done at our houses and with helping my dad. She and I were dividing out the different errands and then I will admit griping about some things because seriously it seems like there is just a myriad of TO DO items on the list ALL day every day..
I pulled into the driveway and had to wait for the garage door to open up. I looked over to the right and my roses next to the sidewalk were so FREAKING pretty.. Sooooo pretty. I then in mid conversation told Cara "oh my hell my roses are so freaking pretty!"
to which she replied "did you just wake up from a nap?" and yes we both laughed.
I have been thinking about that a lot lately. About how I am not really present in any moment that I have lately. When I am at work I am worried about what to do at home. At home I am worried what I need to do for >>>>. When I am with >>>> I am wondering when I will get to the store...blah blah blah.. Everywhere I am my head is somewhere else.
I love working in the yard because it is a task that keeps you in the moment. You are doing what you need to do and that is all you are doing right this minute and as you work you see results and when you are done you look around and see if it paid off.
I really feel that no one takes enough time anymore to be Present in their own life. And believe me lots of things pass us by this way..
So I am going to try to do as my kids used to tell me when they were little (and believe me Kids have the best advise:) "Slown down I want to see it !" and we would and we DID.
Stop and smell your Roses

Letters--Letter to Me

I've been wanting to write a letter to my past self for a while now.
I saw it on a few blogs recently and that was all the encouragement I needed.
This is a letter to me at 17.
Pic of a senior pic...pretend you can't see me in the reflection taking the picture. This was the best I could do.
Shar,

First of all, I know you'd be both fascinated and annoyed by this letter. I know you won't want to read what it says, because you think that you know what's best for you. Let me start out by assuring you that you are happy. You are still you! You argue and cry. You love chocolate still. You still have big dreams and goals for your life. You still love baths and new jeans. You still love your mom a lot. More importantly, yes, you still laugh with Shane about your parents (and yes, you like Shane's fiance! WOOHOO!) You like your television shows although they no longer are your life most nights. You still read and shop and tan. You haven't lost yourself. You are beyond pleased with where you are at in your life...and I know you'd be even happier on the way getting there if you'd just take these little bits of advice:

*Go to a singles ward and quickly! Don't wait around feeling silly or pathetic. You will meet some of the best friends and most amazing people. Your testimony will soar and you will get to know who you really are by serving with such wonderful people.
*Pay your tithing...ALWAYS! The blessings are irreplaceable.
*Read your scriptures and say your prayers every.single. day. When you start to feel like something's missing, like you're not quite you--you don't sparkle, shine, or have that passion for life--the never-fail immediate solution--pray and read!
*He's a good guy and I know you love him. You really do need to worry about loving yourself. You are worth so much! He honestly occupies way too much time and thought.Don't sell yourself short feeling bad about yourself because of him. He will practically go bald and you will have an awkward encounter when you see him SIX years later! SIX! And I promise, when you see him, you won't feel a thing. Not one thing. I know you are very worried about that. In addition, you will still be able to text Misty about it and she will completely and totally understand. She'll be able to picture it. She'll know.
*Oh and when he goes it will hurt, but let him. You will be so proud of yourself later!
*Exercise and eat right, but do it for you...always. Do it to feel good. Do not waste another second standing in front of the mirror poking and prodding at your imperfections. Learning not to do this will be very difficult, but I promise the sooner you do it, the better.
*Play poker! Don't let anyone make you feel bad about it, it's your choice. Play lots at Jonnie's! LOTS! You should probably not play at the bars after about a month. Give yourself a chance to experience it but don't prolong the experience. Do it and be done with it!
*Smile at Shane in the morning when he's in a good mood in the mornings--don't be so pissy-- and be nice to him when you come home. You will miss that relationship of sharing the same home and you'll both be "grown ups" before you know it.
*You should probably pay a little more attention in your classes. Especially right now. You'll get the hang of it after the first year, but you probably should care a little more about your studies. You'll have lots of fun in college, but you will actually regret not taking advantage of full time school and the blessing that it is!
*Schedule your classes with Misty and Jonnie. This will make your college experience beyond incredible. You will thank me later!
*Apply for a scholarship or two.
*Dress your best all of the time.
*Let Troy actually cut your hair, the sooner the better.
*Give up soda for the most part. Partake every now and again, but your skin will clear up the second you do it. I promise!
*Be good to your friends the old and the new. The really good ones are going to stick by your through a lot. Fights and disagreements--bad decisions and lost loved ones. You will always want to feel that you did all you could to let them know they were appreciated.
*Don't gossip at work--this little advice will come in handy at a number of jobs you will work in the future!
*Don't make fun of people who want to be with their significant others all of the time. You will eat. those. words. And you still don't take a piece of humble pie very well.
*Listen to mom and dad: don't get a credit card!
*Save your money!
*Whenever Gram asks for grape juice...get it for her!
*Tell Grandma Marty how much you love and admire her. Let her know you are proud of being her granddaughter. I have a feeling those words would mean a lot to her.
*Keep a diary of everything that anybody ever said to you. Document. You will want proof of every occasion when you were right or stood on the moral compass pointing in the right direction. You have an uncle that will throw you under the bus, and another one that will deny things. Trust me...document everything!
*Keep believing!
*And in the words of a song that you will learn to really love, "These are nowhere near the best days of your life!" I know how much those words will comfort you. It gets better and better, but live up everything...your life is beautiful!

With Love,
Sharlee

Here's the deal! Write a letter to yourself--past or present--and post it. Comment and link to your post so we can all share in the fun!

Good Question

The other day I was taking my summer school group to art.
The teacher explained to them that they would be making push-pin art.
(using push-pins to punch tiny holes in your paper in a design you like)
She told them they could draw their picture first and then poke if they'd like.
"Any questions?"

"Yeah. Um. What if we want to draw a dragon but we don't know how to?"

Something about this question really made me laugh.
I think the teacher was looking for questions like, "Where do I get the cardboard?" or "Can I take it home and finish it at the end of the day?" Not
"What do we do if we're lacking the skills to make our desirable masterpiece?"
I wish it were that simple.
What if I really want to be a healthy, motivated individual but I don't know how to?
What if I really want to be selfless but I don't know how to?
What if I want to be more disciplined but I don't know how?

What if...a million other things.

And the answer to his question is the same to alllllllllll of mine:
"Just do your best and keep practicing."
Pretty simple answer, too. Don't you think?

Is It Just Me?

Or does Ames resemble a Disney Character?Perhaps he looks a little like Flynn Rider?

Or every tall-dark-handsome white knight character in every Disney movie?

Source

I'm not really making fun. I adore Ames. (By the way Stacey, I just happened to forget him last week...don't know how.)

Other thoughts:
*This is the best cast of men the show has ever had. I have a heart for so many of them. I love them.
*Sad to see Ben C. go--happy about William.
*Ashley's dumb. I don't think she deserves to be happy.
*Someone needs to teach Ashley how to dress.
*Did anyone else's heart hurt over the boxing date?
Who the $#%$ thought that was a good idea?
Ashley is dumb.
This season would be more of a dud than it already is if it weren't for these guys...thank goodness they're lovable.
She is not!

Answer This...

This is definitely a post that require a response, but I have no actual question.

In my daily dose of blog reading, I was led to this greater than game!
So I'm copying and playing on here...You ought to play too!

Fall>Summer>Spring>Winter
Doing something with Zach>Doing something without Zach
Reading>Watching TV
Cake>Brownies>Cookies>Pie
Chinese Food>Chicken Strips>Burgers and Fries>Spaghetti>Mexican
Laundering Sheets>Laundering Whites>Laundering Delicates>Laundering Towels>Laundering Colored
Country Music>Alternative>Pop>Rock
Heels>Flats
Skirts>Shorts
Brunette>Red>Gray>Blond
Seven Up>Sierra Mist
Napping>Sleeping In
Nighttime>Morning
Our Shows(Burn Notice, Lie to Me, Damages)>Other shows
Sun>Snow
Getting stuff DONE>Blogging your to-do list away...

and that's why I need to stop now.

But take a second and share yours...anything goes!

Crafting...

First of all don't you all love it when my mom chastises you for not commenting on my blog. I do. It's as if she fears I'm getting the cold shoulder from mean girls in high school or something and she's "going to put a stop to it," to use a favorite phrase of hers. It just makes me smile. Mom has my back, always!

Something you should all know about me and if you don't, you should:

I don't craft.

Like at all.
More importantly, I am more than okay with this. I have zero desire to craft.
First of all, I do homemade gifts and things like that but that's not the same in my mind. Not at all.

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I don't decorate my house in blocks of wood either painted in chalk board paint or mod-podged in scrapbook paper and vinyl lettering that declare the weekly menu, the day of the week, what I believe, FHE responsibilities, etc...
I'm not saying anything about those that do. It's definitely a talent and takes a lot of patience. They usually have homes that look like someone really cares.
It's just not my thing and here's why:
-You don't stop. That's the problem. If you are a crafter you don't just make a menu. That would be fine with me. No! You have to continue playing and making more and more things. Then you have to find somewhere to put those things. Rotate? If I rotate, I have to find somewhere to store the things I'm not using. I barely have Christmas decorations. I just can't handle the constant rotation of things seasonal...versatile, etc. Call me uncreative, but it's just how I am.
-I'm impatient with crafting. I don't enjoy the process. I want the end result and I want it now. This usually leaves me with a sloppy thing that would have been better crafted by one of my students.
-Especially in my decorating style, I prefer to keep things clean and simple.
-Dust. I don't like dust and these extra things laying around my house just collect dust and that just gives me more work to do.
-Craft rooms. Talk about overwhelming. An entire room full of supplies. Keeping that room up to par for the latest fad would add up to a lot of money and fast. I cannot imagine having an entire room of scrap book paper, stamps, ribbon, etc. To some people, this is an absolute dream. I could not relate any less.
-The cost, which I basically just discussed. Seriously, though, the cost! Oh my goodness....money money money. I have the hardest time getting handmade cards as gifts. They are usually wonderfully creative and pretty and they give you a temporary thrill. Let's be honest, though, it's a card. A card. I will throw it away or feel bad about throwing it away and I will hold onto it and it will clutter and then I'll be resentful about the card I once found beautiful. It only adds flam to the fire when you take into consideration how much money someone probably spent to make said card...and then add TIME on top of that. It's just too much pressure on the recipient.

At first I felt that my lack of desire in the crafting department was blamed on my mom. I have even attended an enrichment night crafting thing here and there. It is just not in the stars for me. It's the truth. I know for myself: crafting is not my thing.

Our Dads

Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!--Lydia M. Child

And how blessed we are (Zach and I) to have so many father figures in our lives.
Thanks to my daddy, Zach's dads, and our grandpas for blessing our lives. We love you!

Oh, and if you're looking for clarification--my husband is the baby in this photo. Not the man holding the baby, that would be his dad. Did it trip you out? It does me...every. single. time.

Wore Two Different Shoes Today

Soooooooo... I wore two very different shoes to work today and am seriously worried where my head has gone. Whatever was left of it..
Anyway I was kind of sorry not to see answers to Shar's blog so I am going to do that today and then I hope to see comments from people on one of ours. I like to hear what other people are like.It is more fun for me.
10 things you wish you could say to ten different people right now:
1. Man I am glad you are home!!
2. Please pay attention to what you are doing right now .. your future depends on it.
3. I am so very ashamed of you for that.. then I would actually like to finish with the reasons why and slap them.
4. Knock it off ..
5. You are so excellent
6. Thanks for being so good to my dad
7. Let me tell you the truth about my family.. as you know NOTHING of it and have made incorrect judgements on all of it!!
8. Apologize to me and MEAN it.
9. Life does not suck
10. Wow not what I think we should be talking about but???
9 things about yourself :
1. I LOVE my husband.. more than people really know
2. I LOVE My kids as in above and I actually love their spouse
and fiance too. I lucked out.
3. Cleaning is like therapy to me, it is the one thing I can do and see an immediate result
4. I am not nice in my mind even when I try to be sometimes.
5. I Love to read
6. I would live in San Francisco if I could get Todd to do it
7. I work hard
8. I do not like women as a whole very much. I know some very good ones too but.....
9. I want to go to 3 movies in a row in one day and eat popcorn at every single one of them.
8 Ways to win your heart:
1. Be kind to older people, kids, waiters,cashiers everyone..
2. Have good manners
3. Make me laugh
4. Laugh at me..
5. Show respect
6. Listen to me rant
7. Surprise me
8. Love me
9. Let me love you back
7 things that cross your mind a lot
1. What are my kids doing .. mind you they are 26 and 22 and this thought has crossed my mind for the same amount of years they have been alive
2. When can I go to a movie and what is playing this week?
3. I have to get ... and .... and .... done
4. Todd
5. My Dad
6. I need to get more sleep and exercise
7. Church
6 things you wish you'd never done:
well more like 6 things I wish I had done
1. Paid much more attention to my kids and been better
at protecting and caring for them
2. Been ready to go to the temple when I got married and been a more gospel centered mom.. my kids are just good and
I got lucky
3. Finished School
4. Been less of a dormat and then lost my temper. happens all the time even now
5. NEVER let myself get so overweight
6. Never Said what I thought until I thought some more about it
5 people who mean a lot (in no order):
1.Todd
2.Shar
3. Shane
4. Zach
5. Kylie
4 turn offs:
1. Laziness
2. Whining and complaining
3. Tempers
4. Excuses
3 turn ons:
1. Great Eyes(and yes he has them :))
2. Hard working
3. Faithfulness

2 words that describe your life right now:
1.Busy
2.Pretty damn good

1 confession:
sometimes I have a really black heart.

Give it a shot yourself. If you do it, be sure to comment and link back to yours, I'd

Countdown

I found this on pinterest and I thought I'd take a crack at it...all at once.
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10 things you wish you could say to ten different people right now:
1. You are truly the best thing that has ever happened to me!
2. My heart is what you made it to be and I am so grateful for that!
3. Stop complaining! So many people are without all that you are blessed with.
4. Please stop crying!
5. Do you remember the time you did/said ________?!?! I'm still waiting on an apology for that. (This applies to many)
6. I love you!
7. I am so glad that we have friends like you! I truly am so excited about our friendship...it's so much fun for me! What a blessing you are to us!
8. I secretly worry that my baby won't be as cute as yours!
9. You're gorgeous!
10. No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
9 things about yourself :
1. I like to win.
2. I love to get ready to go somewhere. Love getting ready! But I would rather stay in and watch a show, cuddle, and eat pizza than go out.
3. I love wearing Zach's t-shirts and occasionally flannel pj bottoms to bed.
4. I hate Sunday nights.
5. Reading recipes helps to tame my food cravings.
6.Naps are divine!
7. My favorite Jodi book is Second Glance
8. I love cherry Coke!
9. I have a very strong testimony of the gospel.
8 Ways to win your heart:
1. Be sincere
2.Laugh at me
3.Be kind to others
4. Thank me
5.LOYALTY
6.Honor your priesthood
7.Feed me!
8. Be a gentleman
7 things that cross your mind a lot
1. My blessings
2. Decorating ideas/thoughts/desires etc...
3. Food
4. Goals/dreams/aspirations/hopes...I'm a big day dreamer
5. Grace
6. Teaching ideas
7. Zach!
6 things you wish you'd never done:
**not big into regrets but I think I could've handled the following differently
1. I regret apologizing for things that I never did intentionally. I am thinking about one instance in particular but this could apply to many things.
2. Not standing up for myself.
3. Calling him several months after it was over. I had a secret hope. It was pathetic and didn't help. If only I'd had a glimpse of what was yet to come!
4. Gotten a credit card!
5. Gotten into a car accident...or two...or three...
6. Gossiped (in general) but in certain instances, I really regret it.
5 people who mean a lot (in no order):
1. Misty
2. Shane
3. Mom
4. My students
5. Zach
4 turn offs:
1. Excuses
2. Laziness
3. Pouting/Being a downer/
4.Being a pig
3 turn ons:
1. Being a gentleman. Opening my door, offering to hold the heavy things, offering to do things that I am getting ready to do (i.e. water the garden, go to the store to get the one ingredient that I don't have...)
2. Diversified knowledge. Knowing lots about a lot of different things: history, math, English, politics, building things, fixing things, computers, etc...
3. Work
2 words that describe your life right now:
1. full
2.blessed
1 confession:
1. I sometimes think bad and rude thoughts...at church. (gasp!)

Give it a shot yourself. If you do it, be sure to comment and link back to yours, I'd love to read it!

Marriage is Hard....

Or so they say.
I heard it again and again...
and again
before we got married.

And so I've been waiting for it to get challenging and difficult.
I've been waiting for it to become "work." As I've so often heard it described.
I've waited for it to become a challenge to enjoy Zach's company.
I've been waiting to want to be alone and single some days.

But guess what?
It hasn't happened.

Do I think my marriage is better than anyone else's?
No. I actually do not.
At least not most marriages. Some, yes. I will admit.

Now don't get me wrong.
I will not lie and say we don't fight or argue or that I haven't wanted to smack my husband upside the head.
Oh have we ever fought!
But I could say the exact same for my mom, brother, dad, friends, co-workers, ward members, the loan officer at Cap Ed.
Anyone you have a relationship with, you will fight or argue with. True story!

I find it sad that so much negativity surrounds marriage. Especially when there's a newly engaged couple around.
I don't recall walking out the front door to meet the little neighbor girl across the street when I was little to hear my mom stop me and say, "Rufie, you just need to know friendship is hard."

I don't recall my mom telling me when my brother was born, "I know you're really excited , but I just want you to know that being a sister is really hard. It's a lot of work."

But if I want to be a good sister, it is sometimes something I need to put effort into. But I wouldn't call it work or hard.

But we do have to put effort into anything we want to be good at. I want to be a good wife?
Why?
Because Zach is good to me.
He makes me happier than I've ever been.
And because our marriage is fun and has surpasses all that I ever expected or even wanted.
I don't want that to change.
I only want things to get better.
That means that I have to get better.
I have to continue to improve myself daily.
And if I do that, I'm a better wife.
And we're happy.

So marriage isn't hard...it's a relationship.
A relationship that I love and feel blessed by every single day.

So maybe it's hard and maybe it's work.
But I don't see it that way.

I Love My Job

The task:

Go through your Creatures magazine and browse the articles.

Write down any questions you might have that you think the articles might answer.

Never a dull moment.
Ever.

The Bachelorette....

Okay, I know I'm like a month behind on this.
It's just that I really wasn't too excited about this season. I wasn't an Ashley fan.
But here are my thoughts:

On Ashley:
*I actually feel sorry for her. She is by far the most human Bachelorette they've ever had. Hello insecurities. I am an insecure person, but I like to think that even I am not that insecure.
*Does she ever wear a top. For someone as flat chested as she is and as aware of it as she is...her shirts are always showing off her stuff...it's either that or her stomach. You would think she's confident, but she's not.
*If I have to hear her say, "I was in such a dark place last week!" one more time, I don't think I can watch anymore. Okay, that's probably not true, but I am seriously sick of it. The show has been running for a month and she had tons of one on one dates with great guys. The one guy...you know the one EVERYONE is talking about...I won't even bother to talk about him really because that's what he was after and I won't give it to him...even on my little blog. But seriously. What a dumb girl! How embarrassing!

On the guys:
*I like A LOT of them. I mean a lot. I can't really choose just one at this point because so many of them have my heart. I'm just attached. This is a great set of guys for sure.
I especially like: JP, Mickey, Constantine, Ben C., and Ben F. (with the mural?! I LOVED it, too cute!)
I also like Ryan.
I don't like Blake.
What a girl Blake is for confronting Ryan about being too positive. He didn't even do anything?!?! Isn't Ryan adorable? I think so.
So Blake can go.
And I am not really into personal trainer Nick so he can go.
And William has lost all credibility so he can go, too!
Although, I'd kind of feel bad for William, but he has it coming.

What are you thinking?

Is it Just Me?

**Disclaimer. Very honest post here!

There are three people who hear this statement from me on a fairly regular basis:
"I'm most likely/probably going to hell..."
Those three lucky people are my mom, Zach, and Misty.

It usually comes before I make a remark.
Something that I think most people think but most people don't say out loud.
But you see, I have guilt for thinking it.
So admitting I thought it and know I'm being horrible
somehow makes me think I'm going to feel better.

I blame my mom.
She laughs at me when I'm rude.
And as a result, well...sometimes I get a little out of control.

I think things like:
That baby is kind of ugly. I hope my baby doesn't look like that! Oh my goodness, what if my baby looks like that.

No, my baby will look like that (admire another baby)baby. I will make sure of it.

Then I think that Heavenly Father will teach me a lesson and give me an ugly baby because I'm so rude and superficial. Then the guilt sets in so I lean over to Zach.

Me: I'm horrible, but that baby is not very cute and I feel bad for thinking it.
Zach: I was thinking the same thing but I wasn't going to bring it up or anything.

Seeeee....I shouldn't bring it up. Even my husband knows better.

Sometimes I think:
Wow. I am really grateful that Zach still has his hair. I'm really glad he will always have his hair. I'm grateful that Zach knows how to comb his hair or just do something to his hair in general.
In fact, I think Zach is so much better looking than most anyone in this room. I'm so happy about that.

And then I think that I will be punished for this and that Zach will go bald and I will be humbled.
Don't get me wrong, I am not in love with Zach or married to him for his hair
(well, maybe in the sense that I want dark-haired babies)
It's just that Zach has good hair and I'm glad for that.

Another thought I fairly often have is:
Wow. My kids will not behave like that ever in public. If this were happening right now and I were in charge, I would __________.

This is usually where Zach is most compliant. I lean over and tell him and he will say: Oh, I know. You're not horrible. People need to learn to raise their children. Sometimes in church Zach will remark out loud, "Time to take your kids out!" He says it like he's talking to me but it's definitely loud enough for those around us to hear. Sometimes I get embarrassed. Sometimes I laugh. Most of the time it's both!

This is where you are all probably thinking that I have a lot to learn and I will re-read this post when I have kids and realize that I had it coming. I deserved it. And I know that. I do think however, that our kids will not do x, y, or z without proper consequence.

And there are more. SO so many more. But I don't want you to think I'm just an unforgivable terrible person. I promise--I'm not trying to be. So I will stop here and just beg responses.

I know I shouldn't have these thoughts.
But please tell me, first of all, that I'm not alone.
And 2nd of all...any tips for becoming a better person.
I think I may have to send myself into hiding for about three weeks to purify my heart and then come back to reality?

WHY

DOES THE TRASH BAG ALWAYS RUN A HUGE RIP WHEN YOU ARE TRYING TO HURRY TO CLEAN UP YOUR HOUSE?
ARE THE SHOES YOU TRIP OVER NOT YOUR OWN AND THE ONES YOUR SPOUSE STUMBLES ON ALWAYS YOURS ?
IS THE CUPBOARD ALWAYS OPEN JUST SO THE CORNER CAN CRACK YOU IN THE HEAD?
IS YOUR HEAD FOLDED ENOUGH TO FIT UNDER THE CUPBOARD TOOOO CRACK YOUR HEAD?
DOES THE CAT PUKE WHEN YOU ARE LATE FOR WORK?
DON’T MEN KNOW THE MEANING OF “RIGHT NOW” UNLESS IT IS IN REFERENCE TO A TV SHOW, SPORTING OR BEST BUY SALES EVENT?
IS IT HARDER TO PUT A DISH IN THE DISHWASHER THAN IT IS TO PUT IT IN THE SINK?
DOES THE NEIGHBOR DOG ALWAYS KNOW WHAT TIME YOU GO TO SLEEP EVEN IF YOU SWITCH THE TIME DAILY?
CAN’T YOU FIND THAT BRIGHT RED PUSH PIN UNTIL YOU ARE BAREFOOT RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE?
DOES A KID HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM WHEN YOU ARE AT THE GRIMY CHEVRON IN BLISS INSTEAD OF THE CLEAN REST AREA OUTSIDE OF MOUNTAIN HOME?
DO” EARLY TO BED EARLY TO RISE “PEOPLE FEEL SUPERIOR TO THOSE WHO ARE NIGHT OWLS AND SLEEP LATER.. POMPOUS EVEN?
CAN’T YOUR HUSBAND HEAR A DAMN THING YOU SAY WHEN YOU ARE RIGHT IN THE ROOM BUT IF YOU ARE DISCUSSING SOMETHING HE DOESN’T LIKE 3 ROOMS AWAY HE CAN HEAR IT AS PLAIN AS DAY?
DOES THE LAWN MOWER RUN OUT OF GAS ON YOUR SECOND TO LAST STRIP OF GRASS?
WHY ISN’T THERE ANY MORE GAS IN THE GAS CAN WHEN THE ABOVE OCCURS ?
DO YOUR CHILDREN ALWAYS INHERIT THE TRAIT FROM YOU THAT YOU SIMPLY HATE?
DO YOU HAVE THAT ONE TRAIT FROM YOUR PARENTS THAT YOU SIMPLY HATE?
WAS THERE EVER A PERSON WHO TRIED ROTTEN MILK AND DECIDED IT WOULD BE EDIBLE IN ANY FORM ie. Cheese, yogurt, cottage cheese or buttermilk?
WHY DO WE LOVE THESE ROTTEN MILK PRODUCTS STILLTODAY?
DO STUPID PEOPLE FEEL COMPELLED TO SPEAK?

Answer This

What is your favorite kind of ice cream?Apparently, my mom knows nothing about my love of ice cream...shakes in particular.

I kept craving a shake while we were in Utah for Memorial Day...
dieting+boredom= I WANT A SHAKE!
My mom was like, "You don't even eat ice cream that much!"
What?!? Um...okay. Well maybe that was before there was a McDonalds a mile up the road for us. And now, well...I want an Oreo McFlurry all the time.

I've always hated being asked what my favorite kind of ice cream is because I don't feel that I have a favorite. Nothing that just screams out to me "This is the best thing I have EVER had...EVER!"

So I have some preferences:
1. My ice cream must ALWAYS be accompanied by chunks of something that are chocolaty. A scoop of plain chocolate ice cream won't do. It has to have chunks of stuff in it. I will eat plain vanilla if it accompanies a piece of chocolate cake with chocolate frosting. ***That is like the best thing you can give me to eat, by the way!
The only exception to the "chunks" rule is Huckleberry ice cream from the little parlor in McCall.

2. I would rather have shakes than ice cream unless my ice cream is coming with cake.
So my two preferred kinds of shakes are:
Oreo McFlurries...they are just so good. Don't judge. I won't eat cookies n' cream ice cream...the cookies are soggy after sitting in the ice cream for so long. But with a McFlurry--they put them in seconds before you eat it. And so the crumbs of cookie are all crunchy and creamy inside ice cream!

Or I will gladly take a Shiver from TCBY.
The Shiver should be white chocolate mousse frozen yogurt...
with peanut butter cups mixed in...
and after it's blended I ask them to pour a little hot fudge on top
(This gets cold and chewy and it's amazing)

And that's the way I like ice cream.
I still won't say that I have a favorite, but I did share my preferences.
So..Mom, it may not be a 1/2 gallon of ice cream, but I do like ice creamy things!

So what about you guys?

What is your favorite kind of ice cream?
Or what are your ice cream preferences?

Excitement

What's all the excitement about?

This came out yesterday!

And we were thrilled.
We ate yummy...unhealthy food...
(the only person who knows what we ate is Misty and it shall remain that way until I hit the grave.)
I hit an all time low.
But I received some unsettling news yesterday, and Burn Notice came out, and Zach's not in school...
So we ate, cuddled on the couch, and watched the first episode.

We're trying to watch the episodes sparingly.
To us, this show=summer.
And it doesn't even feel like summer yet.
So we have to make it last.

But I'm so happy it's here!
Michael Weston...boy have we missed you!!!

And yes, I do know we're nerds.

Sleep walkin'...Pillow talkin'

Okay, so he's going to probably want to kill me, but I just have to tell this story about Zach.
Have to.
Background info: Zach laughs in his sleep.
This is hilarious to me and I love it!!
If I am not too exhausted, I can "wake" him up and get him to tell me what was so funny.
One time it was a dream about Superman telling someone he would be able to do something about a problem if he could "piss rainbows."
One time it was a dream about the Queen of England saying something about chicken nuggets.
He seriously dreams the strangest things.
And I can't help but love him for it.

But this weekend, I laughed harder than I've ever laughed before.
And Zach hadn't even laughed in his sleep.
I woke up a little early and showered before church on Sunday.
I came into the bedroom and this was the conversation we had:
Me: Hey, did the alarm go off while I was in there?
Zach: No, but the phone did.
Me: My phone or your phone.
Zach: My phone.
Me: Who was calling you?!?
Zach: The Developers of Doom.
Me: Excuse me?
Zach?!
Wait!? Who called?
Zach: The Developers of Doom.
Me: Laughing. The Developers of Doom called you on the phone?!
Why?
Zach: They're from ID Software

And from that point on I just laughed.
And then when he actually got up, I laughed some more.
Zach didn't remember the exchange.
And his phone never did actually go off.

I love my husband.
And I love laughing at him, too!

Need A Laugh?

A mom texting using a pencil to touch the screen.
I laughed out loud.
Although, I would caution you not to visit the website.
There are about 100 dirty jokes to every 1 actually funny one found.
I didn't search much, trust me.
Just in shock at what parents and children apparently talk about?! GROSS! Who knew!
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My mom is going to say, "How freakin' rude!" In regards to this one.
I just know it.
I laughed out loud.
And I am very guilty of having over-used Comic Sans in the past.
I'm so over it, now.

pin

Is it not so true?!

pin

Same here: So so soooooo true!
pin

If I imagine saying this in Sam voice it's even funnier...

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Isn't this the perfect wish for....you know that person?
I love it!

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Hope you enjoyed!

I think there's just one kind of folks. Folks. ~Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird.

I have no color prejudices nor caste prejudices nor creed prejudices.  All I care to know is that a man is a human being, and that is enough for me; he can't be any worse.  ~Mark Twain


I have decided to write today about something that truly angers me and I want to state before I start -you may disagree but I am right."
I have grown up and been surrounded by many people that I truly love(and some that I don't care for at all) that carry this despicable trait.
I just want to state today that anyone who claims to be a Christian and is predjudiced needs to know without a doubt that Jesus would never condone this behavior.
God does not show favoritism but accepts men from every nation who fear him and do what is right. (Acts 10:34-35)
God does not judge by external appearance. (Galatians 2:6)
Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God. (Romans 15:7)
“You shall love your neighbor as yourself,” James 2:8
I know I grew up in Utah and live in Idaho and we do not have as much of an opportunity to see this here, but I have seen it and I have heard it as well. As a kid my grandpa would say things sometimes about a certain ethnic group that lived in our town and even as a small child I could feel in my heart that this kind of thinking and feeling was not good. It left me with a bad feeling and I just knew it.
There are people who want to tell me that their children shouldn't go to school where my daughter teaches as there are "too many ----- over there"
"oh he is just a lazy ----"
" ---- and so is a freak he is gay"
" you would understand if you lived ---- the ----- here are different"
oh and here is one for some of you.. catch this if you think you have a place to stand.. "well thats a ------ * Mormon, Catholic, Jew* (I have heard all of these) for you"
I understand that people think they are justified in lumping an entire group together due to some experience they have had or some perception they were given or even the way they were brought up... This is untrue.. It is not ok.

Prejudices are the chains forged by ignorance to keep men apart.  ~Countess of Blessington

You are an ignorant fool. Clean up your act.. try to gain forgiveness and get some brains. I am sorry this is not a fun or uplifting subject but I heard something today that made me want to scream so I am doing so on the blog .. Can you hear it??
Then as I used to tell my children growing up-Pay Attention and LEARN

If you judge people you have no time to love them.  ~Mother Teresa

What's For Dinner

Okay, obviously we've really been lacking on our cooking blog.
Misty's got a good enough excuse.
Me? No...
So I've decided to change that.
I can at least do one more recipe a week.
So to give that blog a little more attention, I've decided to dedicate five posts to sauces.
My favorite things are sauces/dips/etc.
I LOOOOOVE to dip my food.
I've decided that I don't eat for the food, I eat for the dip.
So:
1. Head on over to our blog and read my first "Get Saucy" post.
2. Plan to make the meal ASAP--you won't be sorry.
3. Follow us, so you'll know when we update!

I Did It!

I made the summer check off list that I showed yesterday from Pinterest.

I did something semi-crafty.
Remember, I don't desire to be crafty.

I do desire to make the very most of this summer.
Because if you didn't know, I absolutely loooove the summer. Love it!
I know the picture's not great.
Here are the things on my list:
-go camping at least twice
-rafting
-fair
-float the river
-pay of (credit card) debt
-exercise daily
-read Book of Mormon
read every day
-walk the Greenbelt once a week
-get a tan
-eat a snow cone
-fancy night out!
-read by the water
-take one road trip (however small) with Zach
-play poker
-sleep over
-drink lots of water
-grow a garden
-church camp
-FHE
-Roaring Springs
-go to the dentist
-go to the doctor
-clean out garage
-see/hold/play with Grace
-have a couples night at our house
-grill
-meet up with friends I don't see very often: Jonnie, Jen, Lynch Fam, Rachel, Renee, etc.
-teach summer school
-play on new KNect
-go for a hike
-temple
-alphabet date
-ENJOY!