The Bachelorette

I know you're just dying to know what I thought of The Bachelorette, aren't you.

At least these Bachelorette posts always get the most comments, that's my basis of what I think you really want.

Well, I will tell you.

Once you go to my new blog and enter my giveaway. 

Do it! GOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Give Said the Little Blog!

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And a little blog it is.
Honestly, I am working on changing that. 

So I'm hosting  a giveaway.

Yes. Me. Here. On this teeny tiny blog.

Well actually not this blog. 

I'm moving on to bigger and better things.

Okay, maybe not better but hopefully bigger.

And I'm so excited for you, for me, we all win!

So head over here to enter!

Hurry! Go Now!

I Know

I'm obnoxious. Especially when it comes to music. Sometimes I just have to share, though. 

This song will make you ache. 

If not, you're a bad person.

Okay, not really. But you should listen to it.

I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up

Ok not an ad for Life Alert or the Samaritan Village Nursing Home

Just a slight rebuttal to Shar's blog :)

I have as a matter of fact fallen into a black hole (albeit I hope temporarily)! I have taken on a very large project which has eaten away at my regular work time and caused me to hang in this place much much longer than I prefer. Then when I get out of here I seem to be running to church or to my dad's so there is literally not enough hours in the day.
I miss Sharlee. I miss Shane I miss Todd I miss going to the movies and I miss seeing daylight like a normal person
In reference to Shar's lovely little post. I did in fact call her yesterday and I thought I had written back to her emails. But that I can not be sure of.
Let me explain the horror of my day.. so I normally am pretty good with where I work but then once in a while there is something that will cause me to have a lack of faith in people. Yesterday was a day like this for me.
We have temp people working here for us in the office. Lately there are quite a few of them. We had a lady start on Monday and by yesterday I guess they decided she couldn't do the job.I have a differing opinion on that but... will leave that for another time.
So they were going to let her go the end of the day yesterday. They don't want to train her anymore so they have her sit with me!!! So she watches me put in the ad, asks questions and I am showing her stuff. All this time they know she isn't staying but she doesn't ... it literally made me sick to my stomach. Did I also state the woman was very nice and I could have really liked her. But of course this is all business you know.. I will also probably blog on that at a later date. She tells us goodbye and see you tomorrow and I literally almost cried.
Yes I am a wuss and no I probably wouldn't make it as an officer in this company or even a supervisor. Although I do believe I might make a pretty decent one. I haven't got the hardness it takes for that.
Let me also state that they did this to me a couple of months ago with another temp too. They had her sit with me and we went through all kinds of stuff and I printed her out instructions and everything. They let her go because they said she was strange..this is literally what they said. another blog.
So basically if you are a temp and they send you to sit with me
Look out!
This is my explanation.. not an excuse.. I feel like that cat in the nursing home that goes in to sit on people's lap's when they are about to die.

Sometimes I Feel Like A Motherless Child

Seriously!

What's up with this?!?

Mom has some big project at work and I am forgotten. Left out in the cold.

She doesn't respond to my venting emails.

She won't take my phone calls.

She reads my blog, though, so here's to hoping she gets this message
This is me, reaching out.
Crying for some attention.
The equivalent of slapping my brother or eating dog food or some other attention crying act.

Doesn't she know that I'm the most important thing in her life?

Perhaps she has forgotten. 

This will serve as a fair reminder.

This is the best that I could do in the midst of my abandonment. Here I am. Alone and in the cold.

Call me, mom!

Answer This

A while back my mom got me a subscription to Good Housekeeping magazine.

I like reading it quite a bit. 

There's lots of good stuff in there. 

And each month they ask a celebrity when they felt they had earned the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval.

They're reasons for earning the seal vary from planning the perfect party, organizing a pantry, thrifty purchases, etc....

So I ask you:

When have you felt you earned the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval?

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 I have had mini moments when I've felt so deserving of said award. 

But they are fleeting. 

I feel like a failure only days later.

The thing is: I want to be worthy of such an award. I love being domestic. I really do. 

I'd say that I'm most proud of my domestic abilities when one of three things happens:

1. I successfully grocery shop. 

This means I stuck to our weekly budget. 

Planned a menu in advance.

Have a refridgerator and pantry full of food that is good for you. No premade meals or anything of the sort. In our house you have to make it if you want to eat it (I usually do this always when shopping--it's the sticking to the budget part that's hardest)

2. When I successfully use the Winco bulk foods section. When I need ingredients that I don't have, if I remember to use that section, I am so proud of myself. There are things that I haven't had to buy in months that I've gotten from there, for the price that a container would have cost (i.e. rice, pasta, parmasean cheese, spices, baking ingredients, etc.)

My mother-in-law keeps all of her baking ingredients (baking soda, flour, sugar, etc...) in jars--because they live in the South it keeps the bugs out. When I was baking at Christmastime at her house, I found it so easy to access the baking soda from a Mason Jar instead of that stupid box. I recycle all of our jars (Miracle Whip, banana peppers, peanut butter, etc..) and I use them to contain all of my bulk food purchases. This always makes me feel proud! Silly I know. I don't feel wasteful and I feel a little more prepared when I have extra on hand.

3. We had Austin and Natasha over for dinner this weekend. It was a great weekend. Natasha keeps a clean and orderly home...like really....and she complimented my house. She said that it is clean and homey to her. She has a home that I can truly relax in...so to hear her tell me that she loves my house--well that was the compliment right there. My home is homey to someone else. It just added icing to the cake when Austin piped in in agreement. A boy much like Zach--agreeing that my house is homey. 

Approval awarded. 

So what about you?

When did you feel you earned the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval?

and if you have a minute...head on over to Misty's blog

She has an "Answer This" post for you, too!

This Post Has 2 Purposes

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1. This is so true for anything for me.

The hardest step for a gardener is getting outside and hooking up the water.

The hardest step in doing anything domestic is starting.

This also holds true for things that cause me anxiety:

Ringing doorbells and making phone calls...

it's the anticipation that kills me. 

Once I've dialed the number, I'm fine. But they'd better answer or I'm done.

Seriously, making phone calls takes a lot out of me. I don't like doing it. At all.

I've had to do a lot of it lately and I've met my quota. I'm done. 

Ringing doorbells. Can't do it. Someone else can ring the bell and I'll talk, but I just can't do it. I'm a "knock-er."Anyone else understand? 

2. But once I do it. I'm okay. It's that first initial step I have to get past. 

Same goes for exercise. So here it is. I want to be more of a runner. I don't want to necessarily be a runner. I'd like to get my butt out and moving every day. I'm thinking I'll exchange dancing on the KNect or Shredding with Jillian every other day with a run. I need to get some music on my phone and some proper earphones, but I think that I will try it. 

I'll let you know how it goes.

I think self discipline is so important and I so lack it. I think that first step is so necessary to conquer and I think this is just the way to do it.

When I Saw This Picture

I knew 2 things:

1. This is a picture that would make Misty laugh

(and I know exactly why...in fact sometimes things are funny not because they're funny but because for reasons unexplainable they are things that would make Misty and I laugh...case and point Ames last night which is why I took the picture that I did)

2. This is a picture that my mom would look at and then later email me that I am the same little girl at 26 as I was when I was 4, 6, 12 (you get the point) and then she'd tell me this picture would make her want to just hug me. (**Kind of ruined it huh, mom? I'm sorry.)

If I know anything it's Mom and Misty. 

What do you say guys, am I right?

The Bachelorette

I heart Ames.

I really do. 

Did you hurt last night?

I did. 

I also played catch up and I hurt when Ryan got sent home as well.

In fact, that's the best thing about this horrid season.

I'm not invested in any of the pairings of Ashley with the guys.

I'm just invested in the guys.

I like every single one of them. 

So every remaining episode will most likely make me sad, because I honestly like them all. 

What did you think?

Church Sign Up Sheets

Oh, I love my husband. I really and truly do.

But we really need to begin communicating about church sign up sheets.

I remember the time that he signed us me up to bring brownies to the ward Christmas party when I had already signed up to bring rolls. That ordeal wasn't too big. I baked while he was in class but since the ward party was on a Thursday and they needed them by 1 or something I had to have Aleisha take 3 different plates to the church building for us.

Yesteday a sign up sheet for pioneer days came around. I quickly passed it on with the thought, "I am so glad we don't have kids yet. Oh no! When we have kids do I have to go to these things or they won't fit in at church?!Probably. I hate Mormon culture! This sucks. I don't want to go to pioneer days activities ever!"

*Note, I am extremely grateful for the pioneers. I honor them. I have deeply engrained respect for them. I'm just not so much a fan of church social things and pioneer day is just...really a church thing that I don't want to partake in. 

We get home and we're snacking on some food and Zach says, 'I signed us up to help out at two stations for the pioneer days activity."

From the drama of my response: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Oh my gosh! You didn't!

You would think me the worst wife ever.

Here Zach is, trying to help out at church and be involved with the primary things and I'm throwing a  fit.

But we really should have a quick discussion prior to going our separate ways after sacrament meeting.

Stand Ye in Holy Places

Well, we made it!

Home safe and sound and rested (finally) after three full days/nights at Girls' Camp.

Verdict: Success. 

 For the most part. Of course there are things I would've done differently or I wish would've gone better, but for the most part...I loved it and I think the girls did too.

The leaders at the top of the hike on Thursday morning. No, I'm not sweating so much...my neck cooler was tucked into my shirt. Lovely.

The theme for young women's camp this year was: Stand Ye in Holy Places

derived from the scripture D&C 87:8- Wherefore, stand ye in holy places, and be not moved until the day of the Lord come.

We talked a lot about the temple.

It is a holy place.

But we can't always be at the temple, we have lives to live.

 So we can always live worthy of the temple and that means we always need to be standing in a holy place.

So we talked a lot about this year's mutual theme which is my favorite, the 13th article of faith:

"We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men. Indeed we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul: we believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy, we seek after these things."

We sang Guardians of Virtue

You get hundreds of teenage girls in one area singing that song and you will feel the Spirit undoubtedly.

What did I walk away with?

In my journal I took these notes and I am more than happy to share them with you:

*We have been asked to make lists of things we will always do and things we will never do. I have much to work on. But these are goals for the woman I want to become.

Things I will ALWAYS do:

 -Attend church

-Accept/Magnify Callings

-Attend Temple

-Pray Daily

-Read my scriptures daily

-Take care of my body

-Maintain and uphold virtue

Things I will NEVER do:

-Drink/smoke or abuse harmful substances

-Be unfaithful to my husband

-Take the Lord's name in vain

-Live a life that others would not call virtuous

*Commitments to self and Heavenly Father take some of temptation away.

*What can I sacrifice to show my Heavenly Father that I am willing to sacrifice to get to know Him?

He knows what it means to you to give that up. John 15:18-19

*Honesty is being accountable for anything we do or say.

*Honesty is necessary for our salvation.

*"This trial wasn't going to do me in and it wasn't going to do my family in." -Powerful statement made by a powerful guest speaker up at camp on Tuesday.

*I want to live my life with honor and faith. I want to return to His arms unashamed."--Song" Valiant Faith"--those words really hit me.

*I need to take time. Just a minute or so, every day to think about my Savior. What He did for me and who He is. I will be happier and I will make better choices every day.

I left camp with a stronger testimony of The Book of Mormon. I truly felt it's power while reading at camp and during Bishop's night as the Bishop bore testimony of the book. I left with a stronger testimony of the knowledge or who I am (a daughter of God). I have always known that He loves me, but sometimes we need reminders. I think that is one of the reasons that I was given this calling, so that I could stand with the Young Women and recite the Young Women's theme every Sunday. I need a reminder of who I am, what I am worth, and what I should be doing. I am so far from perfect, but during Bishop's night I truly felt better about my path than I have in years.I will probably share the Bishop's insights at another time. All I know is that I feel like I know where I need to improve, I always have. But now I feel better about where I need to start. Just a little bit each day. 

I need to do things that remind me of who I am.

Most Terrifying Phrase on Earth

" The Meeting is at 10 o clock"

“ PEOPLE WHO ENJOY MEETINGS SHOULD NOT BE IN CHARGE OF ANYTHING “
THOMAS SOWELL


“A meeting is an event where minutes are taken and hours wasted.”
James T Kirk




“A meeting moves at the speed of the slowest mind in the room. (In other words, all but one participant will be bored, all but one mind underused.)”
Dale Daulten


To get something done a committee should consist of no more than three people, two of whom are absent. ~Robert Copeland

If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings." ~Dave Barry,

And now my new favorite
"Oh my hell this could make a terrorist talk!"
Carma Burley .. after Two 4 hour, One 2 hour and a half hour meeting this week about a new program the company is rolling out.

An Oddity About Me

Remember how I told you about Zach singing this song over 4th of July weekend.

As usual, I introduced him to this song. Meaning I turned it up when it came on and then explained why it was good.

I do that with my country music. 

I have to explain why it's good--especially when it comes to my oh-so-conservative husband.

Who's music holds true to conservative values? Mine does. And I am ever so proud of that fact.

So in good Sharlee fashion, I pointed out this line as one that made me feel all proud of my country values and my Idahoan upbringing (seriously I get like emotional and it's not even that good of a line--my heart soars. Can't explain it.)

"Ain't no shame in a blue collar forty, little house, little kids, little small town story."

source

So I'm sure you're wondering what I'm getting at.

I've already told you an unnecessary number of times about my country music pride?

Right?

Yes.

It's this blue collar obsession that I have.

Before I was married, I enjoyed going into Les Schwab more than going to a football game, party, and a million times more than a singles ward activity.

Why?

The guys with their names on their shirts.

 And dirt on their hands.

 I have a thing.

It's not so much an attraction thing, although that is part of it...

As it is a skill and a man who knows how to actually work thing.

One day I had a friend of mine and her boyfriend (he's her husband now) come by to bring Zach and I some fence making supplies (so nice of them).

Mind you...this is an older couple...as in she could be my mom. Seriously. Her son is my exact age.

After they left we had this conversation:

Me: Mike's attractive. Especially with his...

interrupted by Zach's response: Name on his shirt?

Me: Yep. 

Now, I'm not one to think that it's okay for married couples to discuss the attraction of other people. In fact, I'm against it. This is more of a Sharlee oddity than a "so and so is so hot!" thing so please understand that. This man is older but he has his name on his shirt. Plus, if we're being honest, I'll take the husband who is going to bring in a big fat paycheck and go to work in business casual (very casual) clothes to an office job doing nerdy stuff who can then come home and put up a fence or change the oil, tires, etc...My husband knows how to work like a man and that is sexy.

But there's just something about a hard working guy with his name on his shirt.

I see him as a family man with family values. 

And I just love it!

 

That's Not Ladylike?!?!

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Some thoughts on modesty.

And I'll be honest--I'm posting this because I want feedback.

In my church we teach modest dress.

We know that we are daughters of God and our bodies are temples and should be treated with the utmost respect.

I concur.

I practice this.

I respect myself and my Heavenly Father, therefore I dress modestly.

I also think it's important to dress attractively. 

Again, I'm divine and I respect myself.

Dress. is. important.

You can look sexy and be modest.

Hello Jackie O?

Hello Kate Middleton?

Class is attractive...or at least I think so.

At a recent swimming activity for both young men/young women the young women and their leaders were told that they had to wear a one piece swimming suit.

Fine. I have one. I hate it, but okay.

The girls asked if they could wear tankinis. 

I find this completely reasonable.

Way to go girls!

All of our girls are capable of pulling of a bikini.

They have chosen to purchase a modest swimsuit!

WAY TO GO!

Well, they were told that if they'd like to wear a bikini they needed to

safety pin the top to the bottom.

If it was pulling too much they would need to put a tank top over top.

Because when you move around your stomach can show.

And we need to keep the boys' minds where they should be.

Since when did a one piece swimming suit mean that boys won't think bad thoughts?

That's what I'm wondering.

And the girls have chosen a modest swimsuit.

They are doing their part.

Tankinis are modest...and often times more modest than some one piece suits.

My thoughts are this:

First of all, the girls should be taught to dress modestly out of respect for themselves and their Heavenly Father.

I'm sick and tired of telling the girls to dress modestly for the boys' sake.

The girls should do their part for themselves.

The boys' can take care of themselves.

Also, I feel that we are in essence punishing the girls or making them feel like they did something wrong in purchasing a modest swimsuit.

I'm not challenging my church or it's leaders.

Sometimes people bring their own beliefs to the table at church.

So I'm asking:

What do you think?

Answer This...

So, Shane and Kylie are getting married.

I'm the Maid of Honor, can you believe it?

It would make sense as Kylie is a follower of this blog and Shane is not.

In fact, he refuses to be.

See how this is.

Do you see how incredibly fortunate I am to have a future sister-in-law that I like...

or I would probably lose all ties with my brother.

I love him dearly, you know this.

He's just...such.a.boy.

Anyway...I am throwing a shower for the bride-to-be in August.

What are your words of wisdom for a young bride to be?

And if you're not married, what are your words of wisdom for one living on her "own" for the first time?

I say this:

Register and spend your gift money WELL.

That's my only suggestion.

Well that and be friends, but I'm pretty certain that's a given!

As a newlywed myself, I don't have a ton of advice as I'm certainly no expert.

Why so important to register well?

Because Zach and I was so afraid that we were going to be poor that I thought we needed everything. 

We certainly couldn't register for the best of everything because then we wouldn't get it...so we registered for middle-ground everything (except bedding...we do have some decent bedding.)

I even remember my Aunt Taunya saying to me: We bought you a bunch of stuff because you didn't register for anything expensive.

So not even two years into the marriage and we need to replace things. So I say:  register well.

I know...do I ever seem shallow? That's my marriage advice as maid of honor.

So help me out....

What are your words of wisdom for a young bride to be?

A Little Summer Math for You

 2 Nights until we leave for Girls' Camp

3 Rooms in my house that have been overrun by camp

1 Rug that was left outside since Thursday (or maybe even Wednesday) when I was cleaning and decided to shake it out and then got so busy with everything else that it just sat out there

3 Clocks in our house that haven't been working since Thursday, there was a power outage and I just haven't cared one bit what time it was...no matter what, right now, I don't have enough of it.

343212 Things still left to do

8789789789312 times I have told myself that I need to stop procrastinating

2 hours that I'm more stressed about than anything

3 full days and a morning at camp for spiritual edification

3 nights away from my husband

4 is the number of times I have burst into overwhelmed tears today alone.

1 more tip for working with women

if there's more than one of them, you'll never satisfy them all...you probably can't even if there's only one.

cause 1,2, and 3 of nervous breakdowns today.

5 is the number of visitors that I've had at my house this week. 3 today alone. Nobody from the ward comes to our house. But seriously, if you were to draw a random day to come by, it would be clean, smelling good, and cool. It is clearly NOT clean, the air conditioning broke and the guy is coming tomorrow, and I haven't turned on my Scentsy in my frantic state since last Monday. And this is the week I've had more visitors than ever before. But you know what, I'm at that point where I really don't care. That's how you know it's bad.

My house at the moment. I am only okay showing you this because it usually NEVER looks like this. It is bad. It is so bad and I can't take it.

With all of these numbers I hope that my efforts, though they are procrastinated, sloppy, and little, are enough.

I hope that my testimony grows an unmeasurable amount.

I hope the girls' testimonies grow unmeasurable amounts.

I hope we grow stronger as ward.

I hope that I get to hear more testimonies born than breakdowns I've had.

I hope that when I return on Friday it will all be worth it.

But stay tuned. I have not forgotten you....I have scheduled posts all week long. Read, comment, and share that love. Three nights without my husband, with only women, camping, crafting, and in the heat...I need all the comments, love, and prayers if you  have any to spare that I can get.

HOLD THAT BABY !

The other day someone said to me "Did you have really good kids and so this is your test?" in a conversation about a rather hard dilemma I am having lately in my life. I responded with "Well yes, I did have really good kids."
Later I was sitting at my desk thinking about the fact that I did have a fairly easy time raising my kids. This still goes back to my theory - Children come the way they are.. (This will be up for discussion in another blog at another time Sharlee) :) I would also like to state that my kids are now 22 and 26 years old. I began babysitting when I was 10 1/2 years old. I have two children,some nieces and nephews that love me and 20+ years of working with children and youth in my church. I have A LOT of experience with children. I am simply stating this because I am not an expert but I am pretty good with kids and I am not a Fool.
I was in the store shopping last night and this woman with three small children walked in and stuffed her baby in the cart. The kid was already upset when she plopped him in there and for the ENTIRE 20 minutes I was in the store that baby cried RELENTLESSLY..oh my hell!!! It was not the cry of a spoiled brat, which by the way is still another issue, it was a cry of hungry or tired or doesn't feel well. He looked ragged and worn out and she looked just STUPID to me. I don't know if it is because my kids are older and the time went by so fast and I realize how very sad even small things like this are.
Your children love you unconditionally. LOVE THEM BACK. Don't have them if they are too much work for you. Don't have MORE children if you can not HANDLE the ones you have and certainly don't go telling people how your kids drive you nuts. I hate to tell you-your children didn't make you NUTS you are NUTS..
I made a lot of mistakes and still do as a mother and some of them I will carry for the rest of my life and probably on past.The one thing I WAS given was the knowledge that these two souls were something incredible. I was given a gift from Heavenly Father. He entrusted them to me. I was to love them. I didn't have to be told to love them. I freaking loved them so much. It is unreal to me.. I still do. Sometimes I still mess up, but seriously neither one of them would be able to tell you that they were not loved.
So to that woman in the store yesterday and the ones I have seen in the past and actually I have told a few .. Don't shove them.Don't scream really loud at them so everyone looks at you both in horror. Don't drag them around the store when they are really sick or really tired. Don't ignore them when they are crying.

Love them..A LOT!!! Pick up and HOLD That Baby NOW Dammit!

Why the Blog Title

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Believe.

It's a word that you'll find in every room of my house...

eventually--I'm working on it. Decorating takes time. It has to feel right.

It will be the theme of our baby's nursery someday.

The word sits on my desk at school and I have quotes littering the space around my desk that echo the same message.

I keep a book of quotes and a head full of dreams at all times.

When I was little, I dreamt of my future. 

My future home, my future job, my future spouse, my future everyday life, etc.

My home with hardwood floors and a wrap around porch.

My job as a successful and compassionate veterinarian.

My spouse, my soul mate, he would be the ideal husband/father/working man trio.

I would be comfortable and happy.

My dad used to try to discourage me. 

"It won't happen. Everyone says they're going to have this and that but they don't. Look at so and so..."

I may not have the wrap around porch or the big glorious home or the veterinary career that I dreamed of.

I do, however, have a home. A place of refuge (which does have a porch albeit a tiny one--I still believe that someday I will have my wrap around porch).

I have a career that does center around my compassion as well as my passion.

I live a fulfilling life.

I am happy.

As a teenage girl, I babysat a lot.

I would visit people's homes and I would want things that I saw in their homes and in their relationships in my future.

Whether it was the family going to the temple for a date night coming out of their room dressed so nice and smelling so good.

Or the clean house that smelled like...home.

Or the family pictures hanging on the wall.The ones with everyone making funny faces, everyone barefoot, or outdoors in a pile of leaves.

Every cliche in the book? Didn't care, I wanted it.

Or the wife dropping cookie dough down the front of her shirt and telling me she would save that for her husband for later.

Or the way the husband put his hand on his wife's back and lead her out the door, treating her every bit like a lady.

I wanted it all.

 And I believed that I would get it. All of it.

And I did. 

I still want.

Not in a bad or envious way.

Not in a way that suggests that I'm ungrateful for what I have but there's still so much I want.

Every day I come in contact with something that I either want for myself now or I want it in my future.

I believe those things will happen...and no one can tell me otherwise.

In fact, if we're being honest, you're likely to just piss me off if you tell me otherwise.

And so I guess it's my blog is my way of celebrating what we as humans hope for and believe in. Love, family, friends, blessings, and fun!

There's a lot of power in believing. A. lot. of. power.

I believe that with all of my heart.

It's such a huge part of who I am to believe. And to celebrate and give gratitude for those things I believed in so long ago that are my reality today.

Tips for Working with Women

People who don't work with women Some people dont' understand working with women.

In.any.capacity.

Or perhaps some are just completely unaware for whatever reason.

I'm all about pride in being a woman.

Trust me!

The world could not make it without us.

 And we could probably do the world a whole heck of a lot of good if we'd stop trying to compete with one another...

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I know that I can be a horrid woman to deal with at times. I do. I'm insecure, opinionated, and vocal. Those don't always make for the best combination. But I also know when I've done something well and I am proud of it. I don't need to seek further credit or attention. I get my validation appropriately.

Job well done? I tell someone. My mom, my husband, even my boss if I feel I have that much to be proud of. Lucky for me, all three are really good at validating my efforts. 

But I've come to find out that most of the time...if you just do your job (again, in any capacity. You don't have to be a "working" woman to have a job...) validation comes.

For example at work: I have areas of weakness as a teacher.  I tell my principal about them and what I'm working on. In the meantime, I have strengths. I am a creative lesson planner. I like to have ownership over my own ideas and so I take the curriculum and I add to it. I create. And it gets recognized.People in general like to be recognized for their efforts, but I think very few of them trust that they will be and so they--especially women--turn into catty women and thus comes the dilemma of working with women. So here are some tips I've come up with for working with women:

1. Don't ever let another woman see your insecurity or doubt. EVER! She will immediately want to out-do you. Don't tell her about your lack of education on the matter, don't tell her anything. Fake it til you make it. You've got this under control!  Once you break this rule, there is no way out. She will feel that you need extra advice/help that you need her. The only way to possibly get out of this situation is losing your temper and that's never a good thing and just plain awkward. So just don't get into the situation. Period.

2. Smile and nod through the advice if you've already made a mistake.Either take the advice and appropriately thank the giver or don't take it. Don't make a big deal. Just smile, nod, and make your choice.

3. Men call it a pissing match, I don't know what women call it. Just don't get into it. If you're the less needy of validation, you'll never win. Someone needs validation and the one who needs it most is going to get it. Come hell or high water.

Although these tips are few in number, I see this getting us a lot farther than out crafting, dressing, cooking, churching, teaching, etc...one another. Don't you think?

Musings on Independence

This weekend we:

*Read the Book of Mormon together in the front lawn...

July Journey baby...read the Book of Mormon in one month! WHAT!?! 

*Grilled up and made some delicious summer food: steak, corn on the cob, salad, lemonade, and s'mores cookies.We ate until we were stuffed. It was pure bliss!

*Gassed up the truck and took Mal to the lake and let him swim while getting a little sun ourselves

*Set up the air mattress in the living room and had a sleep over while finishing season 4 of Burn Notice  and I nearly cried...it can't already be over?

*Went to the temple together

*Bought a new curtain rod and a ceiling fan for our bedroom...July heat...you have nothing on us! We will sleep in such comfort now!

*Spoke to someone about our finances...investments and all that fun stuff...

 *Blasted country music on the radio(it is summer after all) and Zach insisted that this song (or this song) get stuck in my head...as in he searched for it on the radio and sang it every free moment he had at home all.weekend.long.

If we didn't live here there's a large chance that we:

*Wouldn't be able to attend a church of our choice let alone read our religious text out in public.

*Wouldn't have fresh food to eat and certainly not such an abundance of it...

*Wouldn't be able to buy fuel, have a pet, or take our pet to a public place

*Would have much bigger things to be sad about than the end of a television season. 

*Wouldn't have the luxury to buy things to make our sleep more comfortable. We were living the life of extreme luxury just by being in a house with carpet, running water, and air conditioning...

*Wouldn't have the hope that we have as we plan for our financial future

*Wouldn't have relaxed and enjoyed a three-day weekend just the two of us in safety 

The reality of this makes me feel bad, honestly. We are so very very blessed. I am thankful for the opportunity to live in this land of prosperity and opportunity. I am thankful for the men and women who put their lives on the line so that I can go out and get a tan this weekend, sleep in an air conditioned house, eat fresh food, and worship the way I want to.

THIS IS NOT A FASHION ADVICE COLUMN JUST A RANT

If any of you know me at all I am not one to give fashion advice. Just ask my kids or Misty about my lawn mowing clothes or my infamous big denim blue shirt (which by the way I am going to gift to Sharlee in my will with that blubbery story about the daughter and her moms shirt)
But here are a few things I DO know from living 51 years and working almost 40 of that. Some things are not ok

1. Flip Flops in church
2. Ditto for denim skirts that look like you are on a picnic
3. Jumpers and platform heels
4. Things that make you look like a sister wife from FLDS.

5. Sandals in winter with a coat
6. Those Tights people want to pass off as pants with a shirt that
is up to your rear..Not Ok EVEN if you have a good rear !!
7. White nylons.. on anyone ever.. unless you are playing out a
fairy godmother fantasy.. in which case we should not be
seeing this anyway




8. Birkenstocks with socks

9.Sandals with socks




10. Tank Tops with half yourself hanging out if half yourself
is over 100 pounds and I am giving a grand leeway here


11. Camping shorts in the office .. unless your office is at the
Bureau of Land Management or a national park
12. Sweatpants as work attire
13. Those matching sets that look like you got your outfit at
Osh Kosh or Baby Gap To quote Shar's friend Renee.."just
because your top and bottom match doesn't mean you should
wear them to work."


So here is my post for the day. See you at the mall- I hear Penney's is having an excellent sale.